Dina Bokai

Every New Year, like clockwork, we fall for the same rituals. We make vision boards. We write desire lists. We set intentions. We scroll through horoscope reels. We watch the sky fill up with fireworks and maybe even whisper wishes into the night. 

We try to summon the future into shape, manifesting as hard as we can. We reflect on the past year, the way our lives have unfolded so far—our achievements, lessons learned, biggest letdowns, and most confusing detours—and find comfort in believing that the dots of our past and our future are all connected. That they have a logic to them we just can’t see yet.

But the truth is, none of us really knows. And that’s both terrifying and, somehow, kind of beautiful.

Have you binged or started watching Lena Dunham’s Too Much on Netflix yet? I wasn’t exactly waiting for that one to drop, nor would I consider myself a Lena Dunham fan (I haven’t even watched Girls!). But five episodes in, I found myself unexpectedly…well, moved. 

What started as a girly background show turned into something that felt deeper, scratching beneath the surface, shifting from a fluffy rom-com to a quiet, witty take on relationships, intimacy, self-worth, and the little ways we make ourselves smaller to fit in.

Happy New Year! As we journey into 2021, I wanted to share with you a prompt that inspired me to set my intentions and direction for the new year. Yes direction, because I no longer set resolutions. My direction and intentions act as a guiding compass for my year and next steps.

This is what I know at 30. These are lessons learned the hard way. Lessons that I’ll sometimes forget and have to remind myself of. These are lessons from 30 years of growth, love, passion, heartache, healing, life experience laid down here for you, hoping you’ll find some comfort or resonance or a nugget of advice that might prove helpful for you too. These are my two cents on surviving and celebrating my 20s.

Perhaps you've recently graduated and haven't found the right job yet. Maybe you're finding it hard to get your career back on track after taking a break to raise your children. Perhaps you're stuck doing a job you don't like to make ends meet. Maybe you'd hoped that by now you'd be: running a successful business, married, financially independent, having kids…, etc.

From dinner parties to networking events, mingling with new faces and others we haven’t seen in a while, inevitably leads to being asked “What do you do?” over and over again - a common question that we use to fill awkward silences and start conversations, or a seemingly innocent attempt to put people in labelled boxes.

Have you ever looked at someone and thought, “Why didn’t I come up with that idea first?” or “I wish I had their job or relationship” and then got sucked into an emotional tornado of jealousy, self-doubt, and shame? Well, I definitely have and if this thought pattern sounds familiar, this article is for you!